“Be sure your sins will find you out.” – Numbers 32:23
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.” — from the poem The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost
I graduated so far back in my high school class that I can’t remember seeing the valedictorian’s speech during my high school commencement exercises at the Municipal Auditorium in Topeka, Kansas. I wondered, “How does someone earn an “A+” in each and every one of their classes, with the variety of subjects and disciplines, from the first day of Freshman year to the last day of Senior year?” It was astonishing to me.
And yet, since there are approximately 26,727 high schools in the United States covering both public and private institutions, it follows that each one honors a valedictorian. The odds are that one may live on your street or work in your building.
Have you ever wondered what ends up happening to these unique students?
Two of them recently met up on a sidewalk in New York City … one of them ending up dead. A valedictorian from Towson, Maryland we’ll call “L” graduated from a prestigious private school where tuition runs $37,690 per year.[1] A valedictorian from Jewell, Iowa we’ll call “B” graduated from a rural public school with 50 students in his senior class.[2]
B ended up as Chief Executive Officer of the largest health insurer in the United States. L worked remotely for an online car sales company.
B got married and raised two sons. L moved to Hawaii to work on his health and fitness after suffering from a back injury.
The intriguing question: how did these valedictorians take such divergent life paths? What choices led to their ultimate ends? The one, B, 50 years old, buried in Maple Grove, Minnesota after being shot in the back. The other, L, 26 years old, educated in the Ivy League, facing trial for murder and possibly life in prison. Who mentored them … who discipled them? What forceful factors drove them to take the roads they traveled?
The truth is each possessed free will. Both were created in the image of God and given a clear runway to chart their life course. One seems to have plowed ahead attempting to make the best of his options. The other seemingly bogged down in a ditch of grievance and rage. Two roads diverged in a wood …
The truth is each of us has free will. We all enjoy freedom of choice. For men, the road from boyhood to manhood is fraught with peril. Sociologists describe an interruption in this fragile process a “failure to launch.”[3] Scripture teaches trusting God and following Jesus Christ is the best way to persevere. The apostle Paul wrote, “No test or temptation that comes your way is beyond the course of what others have had to face. All you need to remember is that God will never let you down; he’ll never let you be pushed past your limit; he’ll always be there to help you come through it.”[4]
Recently, I was jogging (shuffling really) across a bridge near our neighborhood. I felt like stopping … “it’s too cold, it’s too windy, I’m so old, my foot hurts” … when I came upon a sign literally tacked to a fence on the bridge:
“Don’t Make the Excuse – Make the Effort”
The antinomian anarchist argues: “Okay, I have God-given free will … I can do whatever I want!” However, this is not what Scripture teaches. To the Galatians Paul wrote: “For, dear brothers, you have been given freedom: not freedom to do wrong, but freedom to love and serve each other.”[5]
So, do you know a young man you might encourage today along his path from boyhood to manhood? Do you know of a single mother you might assist? Are there widows in your neighborhood who could use a helping hand?
What will people say about you at your funeral? What legacy will you leave? In Latin, “valedictorian” translates to “vale dicere,” which means “to say farewell.”
“Vale“: This Latin word means “farewell”.
“Dicere“: This Latin word means “to say”.
Therefore, a “valedictorian” is essentially a person who gives a farewell speech, a final word. I’ve heard several pastors say, “A man’s life preaches his own funeral.” What will your valedictorian sermon be?
[1] https://www.gilman.edu/admissions/affording-gilman
[2] https://www.yahoo.com/news/them-slain-unitedhealthcare-ceo-brian-162103684.html
[3] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/talking-about-men/202008/failure-to-launch-in-young-men-is-a-mental-health-issue
[4] 1 Corinthians 10:13 (The Message)
[5] Galatians 5:13 (The Living Bible)
© Dr. Paul Pettit
This post first appeared in NewCommandment.org.
Dr. Paul Pettit is Director of Career Services; Adjunct Professor in Pastoral Ministries, Media Arts and Worship, and Educational Ministries and Leadership at Dallas Theological Seminary.
Resources for Dads
A five-time dad, Dr. Paul Pettit has become a spokesman for the responsible fatherhood movement. Dr. Pettit has founded Dynamic Dads which offers key resources to help Dads succeed in their unique role of fathering. His website provides curriculum for either existing small groups, or for forming a new Dynamic Dads group at your church.
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Learn how to form teams of men for every widow, single mom
and fatherless child in your church at NewCommandment.org.
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