Now that we’ve identified the five circles of a Christian man’s responsibility to guarantee the well-being of those in need around him — himself, his family, his extended family, his church and his neighbors — the next question is how one goes about fulfilling this responsibility without being completely overwhelmed.
At first, one would think that guaranteeing the well-being of all of these people is an impossible task, especially when it comes to people in the outer circles. Perhaps you feel the same incredulity Moses felt leading his hungry people in the wilderness, “”Here I am,” Moses complained to God, “Among six hundred thousand men on foot, and you say, ‘I will give them meat to eat for a whole month!'” (Numbers 11:21). You probably also identify with how the disciples of Jesus felt when they looked out at several thousand people who had followed them into the wilderness and then heard Jesus tell them, “You feed them!” (Matthew 14:16).
I often think of this latter story, called “The Feeding of the Five Thousand”, when I consider what God is calling us to do with those in need around us. Just as the disciples looked at their meager resources–five loaves of bread and two fish–and concluded that there was no way they could meet Jesus’ demand, so we look at our own resources and decide that they are insufficient to meet all these needs. Often, we may barely have enough to meet our own needs and the needs of our own family, let alone the needs of those outside our family.
But Jesus showed his disciples, and all of his disciples who would follow after them, that if we trust him with our finite resources to meet the needs of those around us, he will in fact meet those needs. “God is able,” Paul would later remind the Corinthian church, “to make all grace abound to you, so that at all times, in every way, you will have all that you need for every good work.” 2 Corinthians 9:8.
So how do we in a practical sense go about meeting needs in our five circles of responsibility? Here are seven ways every Christian man can accomplish “every good work” God calls him to do in meeting the needs of those around him.
1. We establish loving relationships with those around us who are in need.
We are not called to simply “serve one another.” We are to “serve one another in love,” Galatians 5:13. It is love that motivates the Christian man to doggedly provide for those in need around him. Without love–without genuine, affectionate relationships–as a motivating factor, such a task becomes pure drudgery.
It is because a Christian man loves his wife and children that he makes sure their needs are met. It is because a Christian man loves his extended family that he responds effectively in times of crisis. It is because a Christian man loves his church family that he looks out for its widowed and single parents and others in need. It is because a Christian man has come to know and understand his neighbors–to really love them with affection–that he goes the extra mile for them.
Without loving relationships, all of this sacrifice is impossible. But with love, sacrifice is natural.
2. We work hard.
Good work is, well, work. And sometimes it is hard work. This is how the apostle Paul describes it, “You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my own needs and to the men who were with me.?In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, ?It is more blessed to give than to receive,???(Acts 20:34-35, emphasis mine).
Paul worked hard by taking a second job–tent making–besides his primary job of preaching the gospel. He did this to not only provide for his own needs, but also for the needs of those around him. Then he used what he did as an example for his fellow believers in Ephesus to follow.
In another passage, Paul repeats this same idea of working to meet the needs of others: “Let the one who stole, steal no more. But rather let him labor with his hands, that he may have something to share with him who is in need,” (Ephesians 4:28).
Like everyone else, A Christian man works hard to provide for himself and for his family and his extended family. But when it comes to his church family and to his neighbor, a Christian man distinguishes himself by being willing to take a second job if need be in order to meet “pressing needs” in his church and community, (Titus 3:14).
Again, in the absence of a loving relationship, such work is highly unusual and might even be labeled as neurotic. But because a Christian man knows and loves the widow in his church or the neighbor down the block, he becomes highly motivated to sacrifice for them. I have observed this sacrifice-motivated-by-love phenomenon frequently in men’s team ministry and it is clearly stated in Philippians 2:1-4:
Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. (NIV, emphasis mine)
3. We sacrifice.
If the need is dire–for example, if someone we know were dying of starvation, being evicted from their home, or in desperate need of an expensive surgery–a Christian man may even sell an asset to meet the need. Many widows in the early church were on the verge of starvation. Believers responded in that situation by selling property and possessions to meet needs as those needs arose (Acts 2:45 and 4:34).
Similarly, in 1 Timothy 6:18, Paul told Timothy to instruct the rich “to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share.”
4. We use discernment
?A Christian man is not a chump when it comes to meeting needs. He knows people can be knaves, cheats and liars. He knows people can be unwise, lazy and manipulative. But he also knows that there are people around him with genuine “pressing needs.” Because he works hard at developing relationships with those he helps, he has an awareness of the situation that enables him to wisely allocate his time, energy and finances and doesn’t just blindly throw his resources at anyone who comes to him with a request.
5. We advocate
A Christian man doesn’t just throw up his hands and walk away from a genuine need simply because the need exceeds his resources. Instead, he begins looking for other sources of help, such as the needy person’s?relatives, charities, government programs, and, finally, his church.
When the Good Samaritan asked the innkeeper to take care of his wounded friend while he was away, he was advocating for him. When Paul exhorted the Ephesian elders to work hard so they could help the weak in their church, he was advocating for them. In the same way, when Jesus committed the care of his mother into the hands of John, he was advocating for her.
6. We join with others
A Christian man uses teamwork to help meet the genuine pressing needs of those around him. He enters into committed relationships with fellow believers who help him share the load. I call this process “coagulation.” A single blood cell can’t staunch a wound. But that blood cell can and does join with other blood cells to form a healing scab. This process?of blood cells joining together?is called coagulation. In the same way, one Christian man cannot meet all the needs around him alone. But he can when he joins together with other believers.
The early church used teamwork when it assigned seven godly men to care for its widows in Acts 6. Jesus used teamwork when he fed the five thousand and the four thousand. All through the New Testament we see teams of men meeting needs and spreading the gospel of Jesus Christ.
7. We trust God
“Give us this day our daily bread,” Jesus taught us to pray. Some needs are so great they require divine intervention. God has promised us that if we trust Him to meet an outstanding need, he will provide the resources to meet it (2 Corinthians 9:8). A Christian man knows the power of God. When he has exhausted all his resources and explored all his options in attempting to meet a need, he knows that God’s promise still stands. So he waits on the Lord and spends time in intercessory prayer.
The joy that comes in seeing God meet needs in this way only strengthens a Christian man’s faith and motivates him to even greater good works. The result is that Christian men meeting the pressing needs of those around them become men of great consequence.
Fantasy?
One might be tempted to think that the above description of Christian men meeting pressing needs?is pie-in-the-sky wishful thinking. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, there are many thousands of men across the United States and around the world who are indeed meeting the pressing needs in all five of their circles of responsibility.?
This post first appeared in NewCommandment.org.
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Learn how to form teams of men for every widow, single mom
and fatherless child in your church at NewCommandment.org.
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