I got the shock of my life the other day. I came across a website that said if one of my parents was born in Canada, then I’m automatically a Canadian citizen. After checking Canada’s official website, I discovered that it was indeed true.1
Turns out, my mother, Marguerite Reese, was born in Owen Sound, Ontario, Canada, from a long line of Canadian Ebys. Therefore, I am an actual, bonafide, Canadian citizen!!!
Guess I better brush up on my Canadian. Here’s my vocabulary list:
- Tuque: A knitted cap/hat, referred to as a beanie in the United States
- Runners: Referred to as sneakers or tennis shoes in the United States.
- Parkade: A multi-level parking structure.
- Eavesthroughs: A trough that runs along the eaves and catches rain/leaves.
- Garburator: A mechanical device that “eats” garbage in your kitchen sink’s drain.
- Wicket: You stand at a wicket when speaking to agents in government offices, bank tellers, etc.
- Gasbar: A filling station.
- Fire Hall: Where firefighters work.
- Chip Truck: A type of food truck that typically serves chips (French fries, hot dogs, hamburgers, fish and chips, etc.)
- “Take off!“: “Are you serious?” “Are you kidding”” “No way!”
- Gotch: Men’s underpants, usually of the brief variety.
- “Serviette“: Commonly called a “napkin” in the United States.
So far, I’m making real progress:
“I got my gotch all in a knot while standing in a wicket for over an hour trying to return my garburator at the store next to the fire hall.
“When I finally got to the front of the line, she told me I could only get an in-store credit. She suggested I buy some servietts with it, or maybe some gas at their gasbar.”
“‘Take off!’ I said. I couldn’t believe I wasn’t getting cash back.”
“As I was leaving the store, I put on my tuque. Unfortunately, it and my runners got wet because it was raining and the eavesthrough on the store roof was leaking. I stopped for a bite at the chip truck and then looked for my car in the parkade. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find it. I forgot what floor I parked on.”
I still can’t believe that I’ve lived my entire life being ignorant that I’m a citizen of another country.
Who does that, eh?
This post first appeared in NewCommandment.org.
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- “You are likely a Canadian citizen if you were born outside of Canada and at least one of your parents was born in Canada.” Government of Canada
5 thoughts on “Huh. I’m a Canadian Citizen. Who Knew?”
Herb,
Some of our best friends are Canadians!
And I’m so glad I’m one of them!
Herb, I knew there was some good in you, but ya may wanna think about channeling those maritime Canadians. Even in Ontario, “bug…. the dog” is not considered a polite term – much like “son of a b…” is inappropriate. Be careful about sharing your Ontario roots. Ontarians are okay, but most other Canadians don’t really like them. We can say that because the rest of us don’t really matter to them. We’re kinda invisible. But if you’re gonna emulate anyone, aspire to be a Westerner – caring, connected, and a little red-necked. You’d fit right in. Sorry. (Our church needs your ministry. Drop me a line, please. – Howard)
Howard, thanks for the heads up on the impolite term. I’ve made the appropriate edit on the post.
While my mom was born in Ontario, her family moved to Radville, Saskatchewan, when she was one year old. Grandpa Eby became the mayor of that great metropolis and lived there for a dozen years before immigrating his family to Los Angeles, CA, for health reasons. Los Angeles is where my mom met my dad.