Using teams of men to serve widows, single moms, and fatherless children
Using teams of men to serve widows, single moms, and fatherless children

My Tribute to Jim Buckner: How a Disabled Single Dad Changed My Ministry Forever

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Jim Buckner

News that my friend, Jim Buckner, passed last week brought both sadness to my heart and also a flood of wonderful memories to my mind. Jim, for those of you who have never met him, was a member of my church in Quincy, Illinois.

Because Jim was a single dad who was disabled with epilepsy, he became one of the first ever care receivers to benefit from a men’s team ministry. That was over twenty years ago and I personally served on Jim’s team. Little did I know at the time that my experience serving him in our fledgling men’s team ministry would dramatically change the trajectory of my own ministry and have a direct impact on thousands of men and their care receivers throughout North America and the world. This is my story of how that happened.

Before taking my second pastorate in Quincy, I had a dream of becoming an excellent expository preacher. But my first pastorate was in a small Texas church of around fifty people. Consequently, I had no staff to help me and I did everything myself. Besides leading Sunday morning, Sunday evening and Wednesday evening services ( we were a very traditional church), I taught adult Sunday School, led the church youth group, did the church bulletin, visited in homes and hospitals, officiated at weddings and funerals, etc., etc. I even mowed the church lawn. On top of all that, I ran a window cleaning service to supplement my income.

Needless to say, my study habits for sermon preparation suffered. So when I took my second, larger church in Quincy, a church with staff to help with the load, I thought that this would be an excellent opportunity to finally devote significant time to preparing my sermons. Of course, sermon prep wasn’t the only thing I did, but studying the Word of God and preparing good messages was the main emphasis of my ministry, as it should be for every senior pastor.

My problem, however, was that, being the natural introvert that I am, I allowed my focus on sermon preparation to become a substitute for relating well to individuals in the congregation. I was talking about the love of Christ, but I wasn’t practicing the love of Christ.

But when we started our men’s team ministry at Lighthouse, all of that changed for me. (I’ve written in another post1 about how God led me to start our men’s team ministry at Lighthouse.) Suddenly I realized that what my team was doing with Jim Buckner – serving him in his home consistently over time – was the actual practice of the love of Christ.

And I loved it. I was coming to know Jim in a way I had never known him before. I got to know him as we worked around his home. I got to see his kids in their living situation. I came to understand how deeply Jim struggled with his epilepsy. I saw how courageous and even joyful he was as he raised his son and daughter in those difficult circumstances. And on top of it all, I was getting to know my team members more deeply too. Through that experience, I realized what I had been missing as a pastor…as a Christian.

My experience with serving Jim on our team was so positive that, when I took my third church in Colorado, one of the first things I did was start a men’s team ministry there as well. And again, we had similar results.

I wish all of you could have known this wonderful man and had the same amazing experience I had serving him. In the past I’ve shared with Jim the influence he had on me. But I think only now, as he stands before the Lord, does he know how far that influence extends beyond me.

And now I invite you to honor Jim Buckner by finding your own “Jim” in your own church and serving him or her with a team. You’ll love it just like I did.

This post first appeared in NewCommandment.org.

For the past sixteen years New Commandment Men’s Ministries has helped hundreds of churches throughout North American and around the world recruit teams of men who permanently adopt their widowed and single parents in their congregations for the purpose of donating two hours of service to them one Saturday morning each month. We accomplish this with a free training site called New Commandment Men’s Ministry

Learn how to mobilize your men’s ministry to meet every pressing need in your church here.

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Learn how to form teams of men for every widow, single mom

and fatherless child in your church at NewCommandment.org.

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  1. See my post “How God Led Me Into Ministry to the Widowed and Single Parents“.

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