A breath of fresh air has been blowing through Ammons Circle lately. Over the last four years, seven young families have moved onto our block. Besides their young children, they’ve brought with them a zeal for updating and renovating their forty-something homes. Most of them have followed the new post Christian norm: moving in as unmarried couples and then getting married after they get settled down. But one young couple was different. They were already married when they moved into the home right next to us.
As it turned out, they’re amazing Christians. They met as volunteers in a youth group in a large church a few blocks from our home. They have two adorable young children: an infant and a toddler. She teaches in a local high school and he is a civil engineer. They participate in a church small group that meets in their home. It’s comprised of other young couples like them. And get this: they both have a vision for community and reaching our neighbors for Christ.
I’m especially impressed with the husband. He’s a successful engineer, but he wants to quit his desk job and become a fireman. So he’s been training to get into shape. Every day after work he lifts humongous weights in his garage, climbs a twenty foot rope hanging from a tree in his backyard and then works out on the gymnastic rings that hang from the same tree. He takes his shirt off when he starts to sweat. This guy is ripped!
Oh, and he’s found time to completely renovate the first floor of his home and install sprinkler systems in his front and back yards.
And on top of all that, he drives a red Corvette.
I have to say, kudos to the church that has discipled this young couple and nurtured them into the believers that they are. They have a love for people and a zeal for life that’s unstoppable.
And yet…and yet…I wonder if their church has made the same mistake that most churches make with their young couples: encourage them to think that the primary application of their Christianity is to their marriage and their children. Yes, Christianity has direct and immediate applications for marriage and family. But scripture is clear that marriage and family are not the primary application of Christianity. The primary application of Christianity is to the body of Christ.
Jesus didn’t command us to love our wives and children as he has loved us. He commanded us to love each other (that is, fellow believers) as he has loved us. Our wives and children are included in that command, of course. But they are not the primary focus of that command. Even when scripture does get around to commanding husbands to love their wives, it’s presented as derivative: “Husbands love your wives as Christ loves the church.” Jesus purposely took his disciples away from their wives and children and homes and land in order to teach them this lesson.
Therefore, when the church encourages young couples to focus solely on their relationship and their family, the body of Christ as a whole suffers. The reason is because there are many in the church who have no family, such as singles, widows, widowers, fatherless children, and the disabled. Young couples have very full and meaningful lives, as the above description demonstrates. Because of that, they can easily forget that there’s a whole population of people in their church who no longer have that kind of life. And as a result, their needs go unmet.
At least the dear couple who live next door to us have been taught to reach out to their neighbors. I love that. But what I wonder is if they’ve ever been taught about the needs in their own church and if they’ve been given a vision for meeting those needs.
My neighbor has invited me to join him in his garage to lift weights. I’ve accepted his invite. I can use some toning up. I’ve even purchased a pair of cool workout shorts like he has. Maybe I can talk to him about their widowed and single parents in his church between reps.
But I’m going to leave my shirt on.
This post first appeared in NewCommandment.org.
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